“Average parents follow the crowd. Intentional parents pursue the goal”.
Parenting is a very important task given to parents with one of several aims; to raise godly seeds.
More often than not, a lot of parents assume the role accidentally without knowing what to do. Subconsciously, we think that once we have attained a particular age, we should get married and afterwards bear children without knowing what it is we are to do. Some rely on what others say or how their parents raised them. Success in parenting has to be deliberate with informed decisions. There are loads of volumes out there on parenting, how many have you read? Raise your children and be in their lives. Don’t be an absentee parent. Be very present in the life of that child because their time with you is limited. Be involved in the life of your child. Are you (or do you want to be) the kind of parent whose children do not enjoy your company? On your arrival, do your children warm up to you or do they avoid you? Create time for your children. No matter how busy you are you always create time for the things (and people) you love. Its not the quantity of time but the quality of time.
Choose to be present in the life of your children:
- What do you say to your children?
Do you call them silly and naughty or do you call them Smart, Amazing, Beautiful, Strong, Blessed, King. No matter how you feel, be careful what you say to them. Pray over them. Prophesy into their lives. Lay hands on them. When you pray for them, call out their names, let them hear it. It does something to them.
Spend time with your Children
No matter how busy you are, your children are your priority. Always create time for them. Know their school, their teachers, friends, clubs/groups. Ask them deliberate questions. Go to their bedroom and chat with them. Read to them. Ask them about their day, what happened. If you are a father, take your daughter out on dates, you are her first love – treat her like a lady and teach her how to be treated by a man. If you are a mother, take your son out on a date and teach him how to treat a lady. Go to their ball games, fun activities, go for their school events, their drama shows. Know them. What’s their personality type. Primary Love Language. Best Food. Best Color. Favorite Movie. Take them for your events. Be involved.
- Love them
Love them and let them know you do. Buy them gifts, Surprise them. Make their special days, special. Hug them. Kiss them. Protect them. Provide for them. Profess your love for them. Write them love letters. Touch them. Help them with their home/school work, assignments and projects. Spend quality time with them. Affirm them. Let them know how proud you are of them. Do not rebuke them in public. Correct them in love. Praise them in private and public. Let them know how proud you are of them. Let them talk and always LISTEN. Respect them.
Build confidence into your Children
Teach them to be proud of who they are – not to be arrogant but confident. Teach them to walk with their head high, not to compete. Don’t compare them with their siblings or their friends. Teach them to be proud that they are Christians. To be proud that they bear your name – give them an identity. Validate your children.
- Train them
As a parent, you are a mentor, a role model, a coach and an adviser to your child. Teach them about God. Lead them to Christ and don’t assume their salvation. Teach them manners and respect. Teach them to be domesticated – be skilled in the art of homekeeping. Teach them about sex, life and success.
“Your greatest contribution to the Kingdom of God may not be something you do but someone you raise” – Andy Stanley
credit: Mary-Jane Egwunyenga
